Andrew Harris, chief sales and marketing officer, DCC Technologies.
CORPORATE SPYING IS NOW BUSINESS AS USUAL: A sinister new partnership between two tech giants is poised to turn YOUR office into a PANOPTICON of surveillance and control. DCC Technologies has inked a chilling distribution deal with Kensington, the company that INVENTED the laptop lock, granting them exclusive rights to flood South Africa and the SADC region with “productivity” tools experts warn are designed for one thing: ULTIMATE WORKER MONITORING AND ERADICATION OF PRIVACY.
This is NOT about ergonomic chairs. Kensington’s arsenal includes “privacy filters” that can be flipped to track your every keystroke, “secure docking stations” that could potentially harvest sensitive data, and “laptop locks” that will forever tether you to your corporate-owned desk. DCC’s gleeful announcement promises “world-class products” for the “modern hybrid workforce,” but insiders whisper this is a SHOCKING POWER GRAB to dominate the tools of workplace control under the guise of “innovation.”
“This partnership is a natural fit,” gloated DCC’s chief sales officer, Andrew Harris, in a statement dripping with corporate double-speak. His enthusiasm betrays the terrifying truth: your employer will soon have UNPRECEDENTED ACCESS to technology that can monitor your posture, your screen time, and even your physical location—all under the banner of “security” and “sustainability.” Kensington boasts over 288 patents, not for your comfort, but for their control.
The era of the trusted workspace is OVER, replaced by a curated ecosystem of patented surveillance disguised as “employee empowerment.” Every laptop lock is a shackle, every docking station a potential data trap. Ask yourself—are you optimizing your workspace, or is your workspace now OPTIMIZING YOU?
Edited for Kayitsi.com
Author: Kayitsi.com
