“Despite knowing that, my dad keeps demanding that I buy him food and other things. He’s retired, has savings, and also receives a pension, so I’ve always been confused about why he expects me to spend so much of my allowance on him. Sometimes, I skip lunch at school just so I can buy him food that costs more than my transportation and lunch combined. I also can’t freely hang out with my friends because he only allows me to go out if I bring him food afterward.
I understand that in our culture, we are expected to give back to our parents and appreciate their sacrifices. I understand helping out or buying gifts on special occasions. But the amount of times my dad expects me to spend money on him feels excessive, especially when he asks for things beyond my budget, like an Adidas jacket or sports jerseys.
Now that a new school year is about to start, I transferred to a private school for Grade 11. I used my scholarship allowance to buy uniforms and school supplies, and I’m saving the rest for transportation and food during the school year. Recently, my dad started demanding expensive food again, and this time I refused because I was budgeting my money carefully. I admit my tone sounded disrespectful because I was already frustrated. He became angry and reminded me of all the sacrifices he made for our family. I felt guilty because I know he worked hard for us.
At the same time, I’m conflicted. In our country, we are expected to support our parents, even after moving out. But personally, if I ever have children, I would never want them to feel like they owe me for simply doing my responsibility as a parent :(“
Author: Kayitsi.com
