Here is a rewritten version of the content in a provocative and controversial manner:
“The Borderlands movie is a catastrophic failure, and I’m not just saying that because it’s already available to stream at home – a clear indication of its lackluster performance at the box office. This trainwreck of a film is a perfect example of why video game movies should just be left alone.
The movie’s attempt at humor is as flat as its characters. Kevin Hart’s deadpan delivery of the line “It’s pee. Now I got pee all in the middle of my truck” had me screaming at the screen. And don’t even get me started on Jack Black’s character, who was given the direction to be as annoying as possible. It’s like they took every terrible comedy cliche and mashed them together into a mess.
But despite all the failures, there is one thing that Borderlands does right: its portrayal of Lilith, the game’s iconic character. Cate Blanchett shines as the cranky, jaded, childless older woman who’s been left behind. For once, a female character is at the center of an action film, and it’s about time. But this is a small victory in a sea of mistakes.
The rest of the cast is wasted, with actors like Jamie Lee Curtis given nothing to do but spout exposition. And don’t even get me started on the plot, which is as predictable as a sunrise. It’s a shame, because with a little more effort, Borderlands could have been something truly special.
But let’s be real, this movie is a disaster. It’s a waste of time and money, and if you value your sanity, you’ll avoid it at all costs. But hey, at least Lilith is cool, right?”
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