The Utter Trainwreck That is "Megalopolis": A Scathing Review of Francis Ford Coppola’s Latest Abomination
The moment I walked out of the theater after watching Francis Ford Coppola’s "Megalopolis", I couldn’t help but feel a sense of utter bewilderment and disappointment. Is this really the best this 80-year-old icon of cinema could come up with after 40 years of development hell? I think not.
The plot, if you can call it that, is a jumbled mess of philosophical musings, half-baked ideas, and random events strung together without any semblance of narrative coherence. It’s as if Coppola took a bunch of newspaper clippings, threw them into a blender, and hit puree. The result is a cinematic abomination that’s more confusing than a Rubik’s cube.
The characters are no better. Adam Driver’s Cesar is a bore, spouting off trite quotes from Shakespeare without any apparent understanding of the context. Giancarlo Esposito’s Mayor Cicero is a straight-up villain, but I’m not sure if Coppola intends him to be or if he’s just a cardboard cutout of a character. And Aubrey Plaza’s Wow Platinum? More like Wow Underwhelming.
The dialogue? Forget about it. It’s like Coppola thought he was writing a screen adaptation of a bad philosophical thesis. "What connects power also stores it." Oh, wow, Cesar, you’re such a deep thinker. Or how about this gem: "I’m not arguing, I’m just telling you what I think?" Yeah, because that’s not exactly what arguing is. The acting is stilted, the sex scenes are cringe-worthy, and the whole thing just feels like a mess of pretentious nonsense.
I’m not even going to get into the "reporter" who lip-syncs questions during a press conference. What is this, some kind of lazy attempt at meta-commentary? Newsflash, Francis: it’s not that clever.
In short, "Megalopolis" is a disaster of epic proportions. It’s a waste of time, a waste of money, and a waste of anyone’s talent involved in the production. If you value your sanity, stay far, far away from this pretentious, confusing, incoherent mess. One star, and that’s being generous.
Author: Kayitsi.com
