Chinese aunt gets mistreated by nieces and nephews that don’t care about her culture, she wants to teach them how to behave but doesn’t know how to: ‘We want to be a friendly resource to these kids.’ – FAIL Blog

There has to be a way of showing kids that something they do is wrong without having to scold them or punish them.

The story below made me think about how to teach children that what they are doing is wrong. There are thousands of ways of doing that, but which one is the correct one? Do you have to take away their phones for a week? Or maybe forbid them from going to a friend’s house? Is there a way that doesn’t involve scolding or punishing? Is there a way to resonate with them so they can actually understand that what they did was wrong and not to repeat it?

I always thought that punishing is not a way of teaching. Just because the child had his phone taken away, it doesn’t mean that they learned that they can’t mistreat people. It just means that they know that if they do, they may face consequences. That is not learning to be better. That’s just learning to be sneaky so that they can still do what they like but avoid punishment.

I’m not a parent, which means that I’m not exactly sure how you can teach a kid something. But I don’t think punishment is the right way. Maybe talking and having a serious conversation, as any adult would, makes them understand not only that what they did is wrong but why. Is important for a developing child to know the difference between right and wrong. To start to think for themselves and realize if what they did is correct or not. To only say “this is wrong, you’re grounded” seems just as the simplest way out, and it doesn’t secure the fact that they know it is wrong. Conversation is key, and maybe if more parents talk to their children more, society could be better.