Here is the rewritten content in a provocative and controversial manner:
European Startups are Doomed: Atomico’s $1.24 Billion Fundraise is a Desperate Attempt to Keep the Dead Tech Industry Afloat
In a shocking move, Atomico, one of Europe’s largest venture capital firms, has raised a whopping $1.24 billion to back early- and growth-stage startups. But don’t be fooled – this is not a sign of a thriving tech industry, but a desperate attempt to prop up the dying embers of a once-promising sector.
The VC firm has launched two separate funds, with $485 million dedicated to Series A-stage companies and $754 million for Series B through pre-IPO. This move is seen as a attempt to attract risk-averse limited partners (LPs) who are hesitant to invest in fledgling pre-profit companies. In other words, Atomico is trying to find a way to make money by investing in companies that are already struggling to stay afloat.
The news comes amidst a global downturn in the venture capital sphere, which has seen European startup funding halve in 2023. But don’t worry, Atomico’s new funds will just be a drop in the bucket, a mere Band-Aid on the festering wound that is the European tech industry.
Atomico’s Latest Fund is a Failure
Atomico’s latest fund surpasses its previous one by more than 50%, but let’s be real, this is a sign of desperation. The firm was seeking $600 million and $750 million respectively for its venture and growth funds, but fell short of its target by nearly 20%. This is a clear indication that investors are losing confidence in the European tech industry.
The Future of European Startups is Bleak
Atomico’s latest fund is just a small part of the larger problem facing European startups. The industry is in shambles, and it’s only a matter of time before the entire thing comes crashing down. With fewer investors willing to take risks, and those that do are only interested in backing established companies, the future of European startups looks bleak.
The Writing is on the Wall
Atomico’s new funds are just a desperate attempt to keep the lights on in the dying embers of the European tech industry. But it’s too little, too late. The writing is on the wall – European startups are doomed, and it’s only a matter of time before the entire industry collapses.
